Who’s 'coming out' for a game of ball?

What seems to be the problem with gays in sport? Where are they? I know that they’re there as I myself am one! Well historically sport was constructed as a means for men to “be men” and a way that men could show off their masculinity. Also it was a chance for them to prepare for battle. Stereotypically speaking however this is not the image society would have of gay men. Sport emphasises the prime attributes of what a stereotypical straight man stands for and they both compliment each other greatly. The strength, the power, the control and ability to protect, all positive traits that put straight men on the highest pedestal in society as the protectors and as athletes. Has this ideology thinned out or changed in recent times and what is the general view on gays in the sporting world today? When the question ‘What is wrong about gay men playing sport?’ is put forward, what is it that is actually being asked.

In this article I aim to uncover and outline from personal experience why opinions differ on “coming out” in the sporting world. Why there are negative stigmas surrounding such a scenario and if the gay community are really taking the right route in solving the fact that there is very few out gay men in ‘the straight sporting world’.

As a gay lover of sport and in particular of football, my sexuality and fondness of “the beautiful game” including supporting Shamrock Rovers have played central roles throughout my life. They both still do, although, when brought together I sometimes feel a fear of being alienated by teammates and/or football peers. A fear of being “outed” some might say. This is a problem facing many young and old gay sporting personalities today and it has been for many years. I never formally came out to any of my teammates, managers, physiotherapists or anybody associated with that part of my life. I spend a large chunk of my active life living two lives but I remained the same person, an often-horrible scenario that many gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgendered people go through. During this time I have found ways of managing my sexual identity and of altering the performance of my sexual individuality whether it be training with my team where I would act out a typical straight masculine role or out with my close friends where I would be most comfortable to ‘act gayer’ so to speak. Why would I feel uncomfortable being myself in the sporting setting? Is it that gay men are not supposed to like or be interested in sport or is it the simple fact of a reluctance to accept difference within certain societal areas dominated by heterosexual males? Well in my experience most of the time it is neither. I remain, as I pointed out already, myself all the time, just in differing ways. We as people manage our identities depending on our surroundings at certain times. In fact we do it all the time. The main reason I don’t want to ‘come out’ to the people involved in the sporting side of my life is because I basically don’t feel the need to. I simply do not feel that the two are needed together for a successful sporting life to function. Of course I would like to have the knowledge of whether I would be accepted or not but while playing football sexuality is not spoken of. It may be joked about but never malicious. It is sport; it is football and that is all it is. No politics and no intellectual discussions around sexuality just a bonded group of friends playing to win and have fun. Often the most pressure on young gay sporting people is from the gay community to come out when in fact it is not necessary to do so in every walk of life.

Gareth Thomas, Wales’s first out gay international rugby player really highlights the fact that even though he is gay he does not want that to maim his reputation or anybody’s view of him as a rugby player. “I don’t want to be known as a gay rugby player. I am a rugby player, first and foremost I am a man”. The fact that Thomas has stood up proud and may well be accepted as a role model for young gay rugby players can be seen as the kind of action that is needed to be taken for gays to integrate into the sporting world. Although I believe there is no need to come out in the sporting world it is nice to see that some men want to and by doing so that they may help others that wish to do the same. They have a choice. Having the option is the single most important factor in gays integrating into the sporting world better. It is occasionally thrown around that the more famous you are the more you will be accepted by society regardless of your current or previous class, race, religion or sexual orientation. To be fair this statement is not far wrong. That is why I firmly believe that the more celebrity sporting heroes that come out the easier it will get for the ordinary lgbt to do likewise. The positive reaction towards Gareth Thomas and Donal óg Cusack, who, is our very first out inter-county hurler will hopefully create a knock on effect and more closeted people involved in sport that want to come out will have the great opportunity to go through with it. It is inspiring to see such supportive people around these great men who are paving the way for young gay sports stars just like those of the Stonewall riots did for the whole gay community in 1969 and they should be well respected and praised.

Some of Donal óg Cusack’s peers have been publicly positive about the news and that will in turn give young closeted people the boost they may need to feeling accepted and to coming out. “Of course he has my support”, “We’re all fully behind him, he’s a great man and has so much for all of us. This won’t change anything” and “He is one of the best genuine GAA men around and will be supported by Cork players and genuine GAA people 100%”. These are but just a few of the very supportive words uttered by straight men about their friend and peer. A noticeable theme behind all these statements seems to be one of ‘Moving On’ and ‘Acceptance’. With every good story comes some negative aspects also and I am sure Cusack’s is no exception. He has obviously gone through a tough stage in his life and not everybody will accept him but they cannot and will not stop him because of his sexuality.

Celebrations and change may well be still a very far away possibility but it seems that the first steps have been taken; the first sod broken and so far with little or no stumbles. Just because two or more men have been so widely accepted does not mean they are covering every sphere of the social world. If more people came out in sport would they be accepted? Chances are that they will but the global lgbt community have come up with a way of combating the violence and hatred that may still exist in the sporting world towards gays, a way of gays feeling natural in the world of sport. The Gay Games (formerly known as the Gay Olympics) and the Out Games are two of the many global events held every four years where people of the lgbt community may compete at a very high level. It is estimated that at each of these games there is up to 12000 participants with the hope of expansion. Are these games a great idea or are they an alternative to actually being accepted into the ‘real’ Olympics. Some would feel that it might be the latter after the International Olympic Committee sued the now Gay games for the use of the word ‘Olympics’. Could this be simple homophobia on the part of the Olympic committee? Why should the lgbt community always have to start their own movements to feel accepted anyway? Should there not just be an Olympics where all sexualities are accepted or is the lgbt community happier to express its own cultures and talents by hosting there own successful games. Maybe along with gay culture there must be a new form of gay sporting culture to run parallel to that of straight sporting culture. Could these gay sporting events actually be the catalyst in making the Olympics a more diverse 4-year event? We can hope I suppose!

The gay community are taking every step possible to diversify world sport. From local to global it seems that sport is piece-by-piece becoming gay-friendlyer. At a slow pace it may be but the fact that the community now have 2 mass global events and a European event on a regular basis is a huge leap and a great step in helping people come out and feel comfortable and natural playing amongst other lgbt or straight athletes. Coming out may not be the answer you are looking for. Maybe just let it be a question or maybe neither. It’s your choice but now may well be the easiest time for you to come out on the back of several well known sports stars. If you want that is.

Gays fight for rights, gays fight for the rights to love and the love of sport is no different to the love of mankind. So the more being gay becomes a ‘norm’ in sporting life the more young gays can feel ‘normal’ competing and more importantly the more people there is to ‘come out’ and play. Maybe I’ll be seeing you at the Gay Games in Cologne this summer.